Jon Lewis:
CLASS OF 1990
Saguaro High SchoolClass of 1990
Scottsdale, AZ
Arizona State University - JournalismClass of 1995
Tempe, AZ
Scottsdale Community CollegeClass of 1992
Scottsdale, AZ
Johnston High SchoolClass of 1990
Johnston, IA
Waconia High SchoolClass of 1990
Waconia, MN
Jon's Story
Thanks to my parents' wisdom and wanderlust, I ended up attending three high schools in three states: Iowa, Minnesota, and Arizona. Here are some recollections of my experiences . . .
Looking back, I now realize that as a Johnston Dragon (IA), we basically had Barney the Dinosaur as our mascot, which admittedly is a little embarrassing. Don't get me wrong, as a die hard Vikings fan I love the purple and gold -- but aren't most dragons either green or red? Oh well, the kids in Johnston were great. Besides, where else could I have sung timeless classics like "Islands in the Stream" and "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go"? in a powerhouse choral program like Johnston's?
Waconia High School (MN) was a wonderful stop as well. In fact, though I've changed the name from "Waconia" to "Avalon", that tiny town is now the backdrop for my novels (yes, I write books for cash).
Scottsdale's Saguaro High School (AZ) -- which somehow is pronounced "Sa-wahr-o" -- was a bit reminiscent of an eighteen month long episode of that thought-provoking masterpiece of the small screen, Beverly Hills 90210. I mean, how many other schools can boast "loving" parents who give convertible Porsches and Beamers to their children as a 16th birthday present? And who doesn't need augmentation when she graduates from high school (a.k.a. the "Silicon Lift Kit")? You can bet that the hotties were lining up to give me their "digits" when I rolled up in the school parking lot driving my classic 1984 Renault Alliance. Very smooth.
Sigh . . . such fond memories burned into my mind for eternity. Then again, what doesn't kill us makes us stronger, right?
* * * * *
After my nomadic high school debacle, I moved on to the Harvard of the Southwest -- Arizona State University. It was there that I paid untold thousands to attend the prestigious institution that currently allows only the top 55,000 students who apply. Statistics show that most of those applicants are actually able to both read AND write, which is impressive.
After graduation from ASU, I used my diploma for . . . well . . . at least a few months.
Emboldened with a (useless) degree, and a red hot career as a waiter/mural painter/graphic designer/animator, I parlayed that success to marry the love ...Expand for more
of my life. The astounding beauty who I call my bride came from solid Midwestern folk with good heads on their shoulders (they also had an uncanny ability to produce attractive young). Luckily my wife is able to extend an unearthly amount of grace, and we are still married. In fact, we now have a brood of our own. Luckily the cubs carry much of their mother's DNA, and will likely be super model astrophysicists while running their own Fortune 100 companies on nights and weekends. After all, aren't successful children the best retirement plan?
Flash forward to today . . . despite my best efforts to escape from my current home, I remain stuck in a fiery inferno that should have been named Hell's Vent (of course most of you would likely know it by its common name -- the metropolitan Phoenix area).
As for a vocation of some sort, I somehow was able to resist the temptation and certain wealth of Amway. Instead, I make stuff up and write about it. My novels are geared toward young people with a pension for imagination. Luckily I actually watch (and enjoy) "SpongeBob SquarePants", "Fairly Odd Parents", and "Kim Possible." I also continue to read fine literature like comic books -- so I kind of fit in with my "peeps".
Outside of my family, the greatest thing that has happened to me since high school is that I've had dinner with Chewbacca -- seriously! His name is Peter Mayhew, and he was the guy in the Wookie suit. And I got to hang with Matt Groening -- the guy who created the Simpsons.
Oh, and I pretty much seem to be stuck in the 1980's -- not so much in terms of parachute pants, friendship beads, and mullets (not that there is anything wrong with any of those wonderful pieces of nostalgia -- in fact, my wife's cousins from NW Iowa just recently cut their mullets off). What I still love about the 80's is the music. And I have to admit I dig the movies, too.
My offspring even boast Nena's "99 Red Balloons" (both the English and German version) as their favorite song. And the answer is "yes, I do believe in brainwashing." They also really like the Bangles. Hmm . . . I wonder if Susan Hoffs is still as hot as I remember . . . I mean, I'm sure she is still young, trim, and has all her hair like the rest of us, right?
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