Kristine Swire:
CLASS OF 1977
Lindsay Collegiate & Vocational InstituteClass of 1977
Lindsay, ON
Notre Dame High SchoolClass of 1977
Vancouver, BC
Burnaby Central High SchoolClass of 1977
Burnaby, BC
Moscrop Secondary School Class of 1976
Burnaby, BC
Immaculate Conception SchoolClass of 1973
Peterborough, ON
Kristine's Story
Kristine is from Vancouver, British Columbia. Her schools include Lindsay Collegiate & Vocational Institute, Assumption Academy, Moscrop Secondary School , Burnaby Central High School, Notre Dame High School, Kitchener Street School, Immaculate Conception School. She later attended Queen's University (BA History), University of Toronto (Master of Divinity). She works(ed) at Royal Hamilton Light Infantry.
Kristine's interests include The Newsroom. Music she likes includes 1029klite, The Gregory Brothers, Eric & Olivia. TV shows she likes include The West Wing, The Big Bang Theory, Jeopardy!.
One of Kristine's favorite quotes is:"Platform promises of the Rhinoceros Party included:
Repealing the law of gravity
Providing higher education by building taller schools
Instituting English, French and illiteracy as Canada's three official languages
Tearing down the Rocky Mountains so that Albertans could see the Pacific sunset
Making Montreal the Venice of North America by damming the St. Lawrence River
Abolishing the environment because it's too hard to keep clean and it takes up so much space
Annexing the United States, which would take its place as the third territory in Canada's backyard (after the Yukon and the Northwest Territories -- Nunavut did not yet exist), in order to eliminate foreign control of Canada's natural resources
Ending crime by abolishing all laws
To provide more parking in the Maritimes and to create the world's largest parking lot respectively, paving the Bay of Fundy and the province of Manitoba
Turning Montreal's Saint Catherine Street into the world's longest bowling alley
Amending Canada's Freedom of Information Act. "Nothing is free anymore; Canadians should have to pay for their information."
Making the Canadian climate more t...Expand for more
emperate by tapping into the natural resource of hot air in Ottawa.
Storing nuclear waste in the Senate. "After all, we've been storing political waste there for years."
Adopting the British system of driving on the left; this was to be gradually phased in over five years with large trucks and tractors first, then buses, eventually including small cars and bicycles last.
Selling the Canadian Senate at an antique auction in California
Putting the national debt on Visa
Declaring war on Belgium because a Belgian cartoon character, Tintin, killed a rhinoceros in one of the cartoons
Offering to call off the proposed Belgium-Canada war if Belgium delivered a case of mussels and a case of Belgian beer to Rhinoceros "Hindquarters" in Montreal (the Belgian Embassy in Ottawa did, in fact, do this)
Painting Canada's coastal sea limits in watercolour so that Canadian fish would know where they were at all times
Banning guns and butter, since both kill (if Rhinos had their way, no one would ever shoot anyone ever again - and then where would we be??)
Banning lousy Canadian winters - In Kingston in 1977 the promise was, if elected, the Rhinos would chip Kingston off, float it up the St. Lawurence, down the side of the continent, and anchor it off the Bahamas
Building a bridge spanning the country, from Vancouver Island to Newfoundland.
Making the Trans-Canada Highway one way only.
Changing Canada's currency to bubble gum, so it could be inflated or deflated at will.
Donate a free rhinoceros to every aspiring artist in Canada
Counting the Thousand Islands to see if the Americans have stolen any
The Rhino Abortion Policy - The Rhinos were officially against abortion because it was observed many people walking around [and most of Ottawa] should have been aborte".
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