Donna Palmer:
CLASS OF 1971
Mt. St. Joseph's AcademyClass of 1971
London, ON
St. Clair Regional School of NursingClass of 1973
Sarnia, ON
Lord Roberts Public SchoolClass of 1965
London, ON
Donna's Story
Bonjour les filles,de l'academie de
St.Joseph sur la montagne,and of course any professors that are still earthbound...and the grads and professors from St.Clair and Lambton I have finally arrived,and glad to see who has visited.Here are some WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT,an interactive trip,my gift to you all.
N.B.READ FIRST
(Warning)Not recommended while
driving,as may cause laughter and/or tears,and/or an intense urge to dance
(Required tools)Space to move about, uninterrupted block of time,a diverse collection of music,old records and player,or at least cassettes,DVDs. Novices may use their favorite Internet music site,although the effects may be reduced,lastly, something that holds memories,or reflects who you are,or want to be, could be clothing old or new,a book, hat,use your imagination!Your favorite beverage and snack,two roses one for you and one for your inner child)
(Mindset)open and/or a willingness to change.The ability to give constructive criticism,overlook any structural errors(like no spacing)or add any tunes where you feel a need. Do the work,put time aside,find,then listen to each song at least twice. I have given you a head start.If you get stuck along the way,'Reach Out and Touch Somebody'(by Diana Ross)of a different generation and ask,you may be surprised what you'll learn! Well,I can't do all the work for you,after all,that's part of the process.Sense of humor.
(Directions)Apply with friends,or privacy of your home,(particularly for those still inhibited,and spastic dancers,this is your chance to express yourself.As you follow the path,take a pit stop,at each song title,'Listen to the Music',then smell the roses.It is not important what order you read or listen here,how much or how little time you take to finish,but that you finally arrive at the end of this trip.Most of all have fun,along the way.
TIME TRAVELLING
I have some funny memories of Latin class with Sister St.Catherine and that pointer of hers and so do my head and shoulders!I am alive and well living in Montreal Quebec since 1973, after graduating from ST.Clair School of Nursing,instead of Western.The Mount faculty told my parents I was not university material!?.Well, remember all those language classes. I can see the looks on those teachers faces as I stumbled over the grammar and pronunciations.I felt nun of them had the confidence I would ever succeed.In spite of that I had lots of friends who encouraged me to keep crossing that bridge to climb up that blasted hill everyday.Before long I had a new mantra'I Got a Name'.
Does anyone remember that song'Take the Long Way Home'? Well listen to it again,if a song title could give a synopsis of a persons life.It seems that my choices of French and Latin have proved to be beneficial in my profession,and I am making use of the Spanish with work,travel and my friends here.
Years ago,my plea to enroll for my nursing degree,fell on deaf ears. A McGill advisor,told me that my marks and courses from the MT.were not only unacceptable,but they advised me to erase everything that I had learned up to that point in nursing and that what I had learned wasn't worth...! if I ever was to obtain my nursing degree or fit the mould.Never tell that to an Ontarioian proud of their education. Saying to her 'That Don't Impress Me Much'I left her office,thinking'I Am Woman',and never looked back.
So,being,a water sign,a stubborn Scorpio I moved forward taking along the life motto of"Where there is a will,there is a way." I completed a certificate in neurosciences from the MNI(a McGill teaching hospital),where I was already employed at the time.I am one of the privileged to have worked along side some of the best ever in their field,DR.Wilder Penfield,Dr.Olivier,Dr.Bertrand,Dr.Hansebout,instructor Mrs.Kryk,and Nurse Robins,and Nurse Wason,I could go on and on...
The scariest thing there was the old elevators.This particular time,I was chatting,with back to the elevator, I heard the door open,turned to step in, and the person with me grabbed my uniform.That person saved my life,as that day it malfunctioned,and all that was there was a black hole of the elevator shaft.
Not to long after,I was attacked in the McGill ghetto.My limited french, school ring,(which,turned,placed on my left hand looks like a wedding ring), jeans and ballet outfit saved my life that day.Having done ballet as a child I thought the exercise would be good,so I was attending the National School of Ballet,a few blocks from where I lived.One day after a lesson,I found myself in a precarious situation,while on an apt.hunt.After a few blows to the head,No..! my own head,I managed to talk my way out,having made up a story on the spot,in my broken french about my husband being at the next building looking at another apt.,soon to be looking for me,while at the same time pointing to the quasi wedding ring.In those days ballet outfits did not have snaps on the bottom for bathroom privileges.He eventually became so frustrated he gave up.The rest you can figure out for yourself.I had not yet learned the'Nutcrackers Suite! The police told me a report would result in an arrest,charges,release,then this person searching me down and probably killing me.Needless to say,by letting this by,I was having trouble sleeping,and feeling unsafe.My mate sensing this said'You've Lost that Lovin Feeling.' That was the last time I lived downtown. Maybe learning'Kung Fu Fighting'would have been a better exercise choice,do you think?
I arrived at Lachine General,a community hospital,doing ICU,Med,then E.R.triage,multiple specialty clinics in our ER,and often in charge.There were not the usual five or six nurses on each shift,just me,my head nurse and a second nurse,one doctor and secretary,who doubled as auxiliary aid,and NO orderlies;we drew from the other floors when we needed help.With our proximity to industries,'Planes Trains and Automobiles',the 401,2-and 20,and a particular dangerous strip of Kahnawake traffic circle,boating activities,bike races,and fishing,we had our fair share of trauma cases large and small.Let your mind wander with that...'Imagine'us being a small center and all.We had to function largely on our experience and clinical skills as we had limited high tech equipment to depend on.There was no trauma team that would mobilize at the drop of a hat...it was whatever ER staff was on that day at all levels, clerical to supervisors.Yet most of our casualties were those that the best trauma team could not hope to save.Many that we saved would revisit bearing desserts,and kind words.Things have changed so much today.We did the best we could do with what we had, and from that we excelled in delivery of front line care,in the true sense of the word front,especially being a non-trauma community hospital.At a recent luncheon we talked of the camaraderie that existed among us.
Myself,I have survived through bomb scare evacuations,swatteam maneuvers,cared for the Hell's(not the ones,in the bible either)gun shots, and stab wounds,held crib death babies of waling parents,been sprayed with and exposed to every body fluid, and many substances imaginable,even suffered head injuries(this last item,all in the line of duty according to,you got it!I smile,remembering the offer of protection if ever finding myself in danger,and I don't mean an offer from the police either!That time I represented myself in court,won my case and left that day thinking'The Times They are a Changing.'
Taking a well deserved LOA from Lachine I did my Nursing Management certificate,finishing with next to perfect marks.I worked on that in the evening while taking on the'9-5' post of Clinic Nurse/Educator M-F on Kahnawake.I had 3 clinic/2 office days,to teach clients.I learned a bit of the Mohawk language.They still refer to me as the white women.My worst memory was finding myself looking down the barrel of a revolver,when I turned back around from preparing a patients injection. That one was just a little impatient that day.I recall being told it was a 42Magnum,after talking myself out of that situation as well.We had a great chat after,shook hands and exchanged business cards,again I was told,"If you ever need anything...."I do have fond memories of the job and miss some of my acquaintances,especially those,now with their maker.Did I make it clear that I was working as a nurse,not a bounty hunter?
That entire year I was also out of commission for any of my usual sports as I had suffered a sprain of my complete spinal column.My car had been hit by a tourist in the Ville Marie tunnel the first week of that new job.It was all I could do to'Cross Over the Bridge',flop on my bed for three hours till my back slowly loosened,then,do supper and work on my research papers.
The most terrifying situation while working at Lachine,was the Kahnawake standoff.I had finally convinced my mother that it was safe to visit Quebec.The day after she arrived Lachine was designated to receive casualties of the Kahnawake stand off as we had close bonds with many of the Mohawks.I thought I would not make a big deal out of it,when I called,to tell her I might be late,so she wouldn't worry about me.Instead I hear my mother telling me about a map she was trying to read in french,she thought to be an evacuation map delivered by city of Lasalle.I told her it was probably way down the road,and she's saying,calmly" no ?..I think they said it is for here,but I didn't quite understand them."Then,myself knowing the reservation was directly across the river,she asked that question,I was hoping to delay answering till arriving home."Where is that standoff area anyway?" Not much phased my mom,a survivor and past R2 army clerk at our London Barracks.She then tells me calmly,that she could see a lot of tanks and soldiers down on the boulevard,(50 feet away).For a second I lost it and blurted out,"What do you mean?"l will never forget that moment.From that comment and the few words...Expand for more
my mom could read on the map,I realized,we were the evacuation zone.Feeling helpless,being stuck at work,I regained my composure,and instructed her to repack her suitcase,and a few of my things.She kept saying she was hearing a sound like firecrackers,and I kept telling her to move from the window!She kept asking why?Finally I had no choice but to tell her,she was describing the oh too familiar sound of the AK-47s.She had no idea that their range was past the shore of the river on our side. There are still bullet holes on some of the townhouses down the street.I told her to stay in the kitchen,away from the windows,and left work shortly after to drive up north for some quiet.We returned when a peace settlement was issued not too long after,as I had to work.The next few days as we tried to sleep we felt like we were on call for the incoming of'M.A.S.H.'as the choppers on surveillance,used the cul-de-sac outside my bedroom to'Turn,Turn,Turn'. We had one day of peace before she left.
A few years later I enrolled part time at Concordia.I had three smaller personal goals as well:to graduate in the Millennium,finish before reaching 50,and to end up on the deans list. Just as things were starting to look hopeful,body and work wise,the Quebec government,as if by fate closed Lachine General along with many still needed hospitals in Montreal.We all went through an extensive grieving period during those closures,having been compared to a patients dying slow horrible deaths.We had all been encouraged to halt extra activities or education in order to put our energies towards saving the hospital from its impending doom.It was all for nothing many of us lost friends,families were split up,some resigned,and some even died within two years.By June 1996 we closed down,I was transferred to my 2nd choice of 3 granted,the ER of Royal Victoria Hospital(another teaching hospital of McGill).'You Can't Always Get What You Want'.On the positive side the government closures allow for transfer of ones seniority, by that time I had 20 years.So,it was 1996 and there I was senior nurse in the ER of the Royal Vic,best pic of vacation and schedules,and for that envied by some and despised by others. On St.Jean Baptiste day,I had moved, started a new job,then heard of my fathers death.
In 2000,at the Bell Center I received my B.A.in Human Sciences Cum lade from Concordia(a community nursing program restructured,name changed as McGill gained the monopoly on anglophone nursing programs).As well I earned a certificate in Family Life Education.All three goals were met,by having a lot of faith, hard work and good friends.Mostly I excelled because of having my confidence restored by Concordia's philosophies in regards to'Respect',diversity,mentoring,with which they embrace their student body,especially adult learners.I finally began telling myself'I Can See Clearly Now'.A funny memory from there was being told to redo a fiction short story.The professor thought it was too far out there and was not even feasible in her mind.I spent the rest of the year trying to convince her that the content was actually non-fiction.
While in the process of completing the last certificate I met with the ONQ,having heard that 3 certificates in nursing is a BN. Again I was discouraged as I was told my first one was just out of the time frame.I let it roll off my back but not out of my head,and believe me there were times,I felt close to that!
Shortly after,the mergers started and five hospitals came to be under one umbrella,hence the birth of the McGill University Hospital Center (MUHC).Seniority then became transportable within the MUHC.I was then and still am the most senior nurse in the ER.Somewhere along the way the ONQ had a change of policy and granted my B.N. Autonomy is high on the list of perks along with self scheduling.Backed by one of the best contracts in Canada,there is 0 tolerance for violence,harassment or discrimination.
The Vic is bridged to the MNI where I held my first nursing position.On the other corner of busy Pine and University stands the old nursing residence,my first place I called home in'1973'.I had the best room at the top with the crows nest seating and sun deck.'Isn't it ironic'.I had come full circle.The trip has been very rewarding and kept me busy and out of trouble.
I just finished my 1st year off in thirty years as I was'Running on Empty'wanting to care for my mother and not wanting her to spend her last few months alone.Mom passed away at the RVH last year.Those last days we shared singing some of her favorite songs'You'll Never Walk Alone,and Somewhere Over the Rainbow' by request.She told me not to worry and said,'I'll Be Watching You.'There are times that she truly watches'Through Heaven's Eyes'.I went through a period of erasing the old belief that'Big Girls Don't Cry',a syndrome that is typical to ER and ICU nurses who possess as one of their best traits,dealing with the high stress of crisis,and death,during a normal work day,leaving us feeling that we always need to be in control and more so when one of our own is passing through these stages.Big girls and guys do cry,and it's OK!'Time',as well will help to heal my wounds.I have started to feel the'Downtown'drawing me back,and have started to search for a new home.Many of my colleagues have given me great'Welcome Back'hugs in support.Thank you.
I hope to be'On the Road Again'and do some more travelling,as I have not travelled since 911. I seem to have an affinity for'Climbing Every Mountain',well a few;the Mount,I am working on Mt.Royal,past member at Mt.Tremblant,hiked Mt.Washington,yet my favorite has been Machu Picchu.I crossed the Atlantic on a liner with broken stabilizers,in the worst of'Stormy Weather',flew over the Nazca lines,in a four seater plane,cruised most of the West Indies,toured the British Isles by car and slept in the worst of the worst places in Paris,(women ask directions and do reserve),survived desert camps,less dense jungles and waters of the Amazon.
To some,my accomplishments are only a drop in the bucket to what others have achieved.And yes,after all these years,I still have a locker not an office,less space to keep tidy.As a child,I sensed it was NoT how much one achieved,the number of titles,labels tagged to our names,positions held,size of our house or our egos,that gave us meaning.I had lost faith in these ideals,by being around those not of like mind.'I'm a Believer'again,of knowing:it's how much we grow and change,if at all along the way,be it short or long,and that we have been true to our selves and those around us,and ultimately that we bring that child back home.There are many an inner child who has wondered off their path,never to be found for one reason or another. Finding the will,to send out the search party,and not giving up the search,to me,is the'Greatest Gift of All'.The mere fact of surviving the ride home,and intact reassures me that I have angels watching over me,and not the ones previously mentioned.Believe me if you ever hear the rest of the story,even you might believe in angels.What you read here is just the tip of the iceberg.Then again,some things are better left unsaid.
To any one with a passion unfulfilled,it's never too late to achieve your dreams.Once you delete those old mantras of what's the use? what's to become of it?you will be surprised what you can create 'When You Believe'!!!It has been a long road,and my heart goes out to those who encouraged me to travel in order to find that road that would bring me home,knowing that home is truly a place we all strive to find within ourselves.
Of course there are always sacrifices,and choices,to make,and potholes we fall in from time to time, all of which make the road even more difficult.When the road has lots of potholes,and you feel like giving up remember to'Walk On'and hum along to'High Hopes',it's sure to bring a smile from within.Excuse me if you ever catch me not smiling,it is probably only a second or two when something pushed the revisit key to an old pothole,or situation.Sh..t happens! They are just memories devoid of emotion. Recently I reminisced with some colleagues at the Neuro,and it seems that some of my pleas have not fallen on deaf ears after all,as I have been told'A Change is Going to Come',because there is a definite awareness and acceptance that the past philosophies of a certain teaching institution were not so welcoming, and see the need for change.Hm...did I tell you that the focus of my BA was' CHANGE'? By the way MUHC's latest acquisition is St.Joseph's Hospital in Lachine.Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Being seen by some as an inspiration, I am reassured that retirement is not in the cards just yet!For it is only as one learns to sit in stillness and hear the silence,we realize how much more is out there to learn.Of course,when I try to take some time off after 30 years,there are still those friends or family that said work harder,and questioned my abilities when they saw me going through'Those Lazy,Hazy,Crazy Days of Summer'.At my age I have earned the right to sleep in,not get dressed,or let a day go by,and not feel guilty,when it comes to days off.For those that judge me,and my sometime dramatic whims,if you have been paying attention,I'm sure by now you may understand that it is not'Just my Imagination'running wild.It's just'My Way'of taking care of me and those that I love.
So,be with those that embrace your existence,and most of all have faith in yourself!If anyone out there thinks for even a moment that they want to spend any time with me,consider them advised to start learning to dance the dance.Let them not be faint-hearted.
LOVE and LIGHT to all
And by the way if anyone ever sees that little guy in the red suit,with his pitchfork,send him my way,I'm gonna'Raise a Little Hell'and give him a piece of my mind for convincing me to choose the road test I took!There must have been an easier one. April 2008
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