Ruth Carter-Matthews:
CLASS OF 1965
Samuel Ayer High SchoolClass of 1965
Milpitas, CA
San Jose State UniversityClass of 1967
San jose, CA
Doyle SchoolClass of 1961
Cupertino, CA
Airpoint SchoolClass of 1961
Milpitas, CA
Macedonia Elementary SchoolClass of 1955
Macedonia, SC
Ruth's Story
Basic Facts
Hi, My name is Ruth Carter-(Matthews)-Bourdon...AKA: Gypsy, Mom, Grandmommy, Nama, Hey You...ETC.
I'm just a country girl at heart, Cowpens, South Carolina..LOL..Ya don't get much more country than that....( Don't laugh... Be advised that in the South, 'He needed killin!', is a valid defense.) I am a mother of 4 beautiful, talented children, 2 girls, two boys... and grandmother to nine beautiful grandkids (With 3 more on the way..(future world leaders.)
I was born 10/8/46...(A wild and crazy Libra.)
I enjoy music of all kinds... cept' rap ...
One of my daughters is a lead singer for a Bay Area band. She's AWSOME!
They say a man's heart is through his stomach... then you twist the blade and thrust upwards to the left... LOL just kidding!!!!!
One of the best times of my life was the three years that I lived with George Clooney ...Then he found out I was there!...*SIGH*
I'm a writer of short stories, poetry ETC. And I am always looking for new ideas and inspiration.
My Hobbies & Interests
Love camping, house boating, hiking, swimming, dancing, river rafting, singing, extreme winter sports. San Francisco 49'ers. San Jose Sharks hockey...Movies, old time classics are the best. Being with my Kids & Grandkids and people who love me. I Love to be in the mountains or near water. Favorite cities in the USA, Redding, Ca. Lake Tahoe, New Orleans, Seattle, Boston, Carmel, Monterey & San Francisco.
Out of country Paris (Naturally), Vienna, Florence, Rome and Athens.....
My Online Life...
I started writing poetry as a way to release all feelings and emotions that I kept locked inside for so many years. I have found that writing is the best therapy for me. It really gives me strength to talk about what I went through and put into words all those feelings that I never shared with anyone before about the abuse, the mistakes, the sorrow and the heartache. Through my poetry I hope to encourage and motivate people who have gone through abuse to keep going in life no matter what. I hope to reach out through my writing. I believe that writing not only helps me to heal but also allows me to reach out to others and help them as well in their journey to heal.... As a cancer survivor I have found that life is a precious gift that should never be squandered away or taken for granted.
Always try and remember the four L's, Live, Love, Laugh, Learn. Don't wait to go somewhere you dream about....Find a way. Be spontaneous...Let life surprise and delight you.
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Confide in your friend:
When you're tired and worn at the close of the day,
and things just don't seem to be going your way,
when even your patience has come to an end,
try taking time out and confide in a friend.
Perhaps your friend may have walked the same road,
with a troubled heart and a burdensome load,
to find peace and comfort near the end -
when he stopped long enough to confide in a friend.
For then are most welcome, a few words of cheer,
for someone who willingly lends you an ear.
No troubles exist that the Gods cannot mend,
but to get quick relief, just confide in a friend.
One loyal friend is worth ten thousand relatives.
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Cancer:
You make friends with cancer by heeding its call to consciousness, by letting it change your life.
You slow down. You pay attention.
You stop doing things you don't really
want or need to do.
You prioritize. You pace yourself.
You respect your body.
You spend time with those whose
presence is healing.
You make friends with cancer by noticing the
small miracles that occur daily--
the chorus of bird songs in the morning air,
the intoxicating fragrance of one pink rose,
the melody of raindrops, the heart melting sweetness of your grandchildren's smiles,
the eternality of an ocean wave,
the exquisite beauty of a setting sun, the presence of your beloved--which, before cancer, you may have overlooked or been to "busy" to enjoy or appreciate.
You make friends with cancer by letting love in.
You open you heart. You tell the truth.
You ask for help.You accept the profound generosity of friends. You let whatever
you may have given return itself to you.
You make friends with cancer by allowing it to remind you of what is actually important in life and what is less so, by forging a relationship with it that fosters new insight,
by seeing the uninvited guest as an opportunity for learning and growth.
You make friends with cancer by accepting the myriad gifts and joys which life offers.
You don't waste time complaining about
things you cannot change
or which you wish were different.
You dance when you can, you weep when you must.
You notice what you have instead of what you don't have. You practice thankfulness,
and forgiveness.
You make friends with cancer by not hiding from it or hating it, but by acknowledging it, accepting what it has to teach
you and continuing on your Journey,
one step at a time.
Ruth Carter-Bourdon
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Cancer is so limited...
It cannot cripple love.
It cannot shatter hope.
It cannot corrode faith.
It cannot eat away peace.
It cannot destroy confidence.
It cannot kill friendship.
It cannot shut out memories.
It cannot silence courage.
It cannot invade the soul.
It cannot reduce eternal life.
It cannot quench the spirit.
It cannot lessen the power of the Resurrection.
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simplicity.....Or I want to be six again!
To Whom It May Concern:
I am hereby officially tendering my resignation as an adult in order to accept the responsibilities of a 6 year old....
The tax base is lower, so I want to be six again. I want to go to Porky Pigs diner in Spartanburg after church and think it's the best place in the world to eat. I want to eat a chili-cheese dog really well done (Heck, I like my hot-dogs almost burnt anyhow) without wondering how many grams of fat, nitrates sodium or cancer causing carcinogens are in it. I want to walk across a frozen puddle and feel it crunch beneath my saddle shoes. I want to dig clay out of the banks of the creek and catch crawdads and catfish, I want to swim naked and be totally oblivious to my state of undress. I want to tie a string to the leg of a "June Bug" and watch that little sucker fly in circles. I want to be amazed at fireflies in a mason jar and believe that the stories that my uncles told me were absolute gospel....(YES, the Green-eyed Monster is married to the Boogie Man and if you aren't a good girl they will get you.) I want my Mom to comfort me when I have a nightmare about being "GOT." I want to think M&M's are better than money, 'cause you can eat em! I want my Mom, Aunts, Uncles Grandmother, siblings and cousins to be strong, happy, healthy and youthful.......
I want to walk to the school bus along a red dirt road in South Carolina and play hopscotch with my friends at recess. I want to go with my family and cut down a Christmas tree on our own land, and pull it home through the snow on a sled and see the warm lights of our house in the distance and feel the comfort of knowing that a cozy fire and a cup of hot chocolate with a peppermint stick would be waiting. I want to make ornaments, & paper chains & strings of popcorn, cranberries & gumdrops. I want to stay up late on Christmas Eve waiting to hear Santa & Rudolph on the roof. And I want to think that a new box of crayons, paper dolls, and a Betsy Wetsy doll were the best things that could ever be invented. And I want to marvel at Dick Tracy's two-way wrist radio (Although my cousin Tim said that NOTHING like that would ever happen..)
I want to hear my Grandmother's sweet clear voice sing "Rock of Ages & Amazing Grace & Nearer My G...Expand for more
od to Thee." And "Find" the sugar cookies that she always "Hid" on the bottom shelf of the pantry. I want my Aunt Agnes to tell me stories and hear her say "Wake-up my little morning glory." Back then all I needed to feel safe and loved was when someone warmed a blanket by the fire and bundled me up in it on cold winter nights...
I want to make a tent with my sisters on the porch out of a blanket draped over four chairs and listen to the warm rain and smell the earth when it was fresh and pure and sweet and "Global Warming, Pollution & Endangered Species" were not front page issues........I want to spin in circles with my sisters and cousins 'till we can no longer stand up, then lay in the cool grass and see shapes in the clouds. I want to listen to the gentle winds whispering through the Carolina pines. I want to play "hide & go seek, kick the can, mother may I, tag & Red Rover."
I want to ride on the side step of my Uncle Melvin's big black car while I hold on to the door (So what if he was only going 5 MPH...I was FLYIN.')
I want a banana & peanut butter sandwich on squishy white bread....And a 50-50 bar....And I want to dump a bag of salted peanuts into an amber colored bottle of Orange Crush without caring that someone might think I was being "weird."
I long for the days when life was simple. When I thought "Fun with Dick & Jane" was a literary masterpiece...And not a porno flick.
When I knew all my colors, the addition tables and simple nursery rhymes, but it didn't bother me because I didn't know what I didn't know....and I didn't care. When summer meant digging peanuts on my Uncles farm....And the way watermelon tasted when warm from the field....Or peach ice cream from a hand cranked ice cream maker on a sweltering southern night....Summer was the smell of the honeysuckle, lilacs, dogwood and wild roses that grew wild near my country home.
I want to go to Macedonia Grammar School, a two room school house where roughly half the students are related to me. And have recess, music time, snacktime and all the good things that come with being in the first grade. I want to be happy because I didn't know what was supposed to make me upset. I want to think that the world is fair, and everyone in it is honest and good..I want to believe that all things are possible.... And that things really do happen if I wish on the first star, or blew out all my candles or blew the fluff from a dandelion...Before I learned that the light from a star was made a hundred million kazillion years ago and that it may have burned out long ago...(And that it twinkles because of pollution)
And that wishes on candles mean ZIP....And blowing on a dandelion only causes weeds to grow.
I want to think that the only boy in the world that I will ever love is Curtis Cobb (Who gave me my first kiss) Because he loved me, and would forever... He told me so...and it must be true, Right?...*SIGH*...Was love ever really that simple?
Sometime while I was maturing, I learned too much. I learned of nuclear weapons and wars and loved ones going away to war & not returning...and the ones that did return were changed forever. I learned of a world where men left their families to go and fight for our country, and returned only to end up living on the street...begging for their next meal.
I learned of a world where children learned how to kill....And did!
I learned about asteroids that may or may not be on a collision course with earth. I learned about prejudice, starving and abused children, lies, unhappy marriages filled with violence and infidelity..Illnesses such as Aids, Emboli, Flesh Eating Bacteria and Cancer.
I learned about pain and mortality...And I want to be six again...I want to think that everyone including myself will live forever because I don't understand the concept of death...I want simplicity and purity, when we thought that the worst thing in the world was when someone took away you jump rope or being picked last for kickball.
I want to be oblivious to the complexity of life, and be overly excited by the little things again. I want television to be something I watch for fun (Like Rahmar Of the Jungle, Queen for a day & The Lone Ranger) , Not something I use for escape from things I should be doing. I want to live knowing the little things I find exciting will always make me as happy as when I first discovered them. The county fair, cotton candy, red candy apples...Mmmmmm, I can smell them now. I want to go to the movies on a Saturday night with two quarters, pay for the movie, buy a bag of penny candy, a hot-dog, popcorn and a soda and still have a nickel left over.....I want Roy Rogers, Dale Evan's, Gene Autry, John Wayne and Audie Murphy.....I want a hero that will never be involved in a "Sex Scandal" And a Princess that really does live "Happily ever after."..I want to be six again.
I remember not seeing the world as a whole, but rather being aware of things that directly concerned me. I want to be naive enough to think that if I'm happy, so is everyone else. I want to walk along the edge of Rainbow Lake and think only of the grass under my feet, and the possibility of finding the mermaid I'm looking for.
I want to spend my afternoons climbing chinaberry trees and riding my blue bike feeling the warm wind on my face, letting the grown ups worry about time, the dentist, how to survive more days than there is money in the bank, and how to find the strength to get through another day. I want to believe in the power of hugs, smiles, a kind word, truth, justice, peace, dreams, the imagination...and mankind!
I want to wonder what I'll do when I grow up, and what I'll be, and who I'll be and not worry about what I'll do if this doesn't work out...I want that time back.
I want to use it as now as an escape, so that when my computer crashes, or I have a mountain of work, or two depressed friends, or my kids and grandkids lives are not going well or I've had an awful fight with my "Significant other," or bittersweet memories of times gone by, or second thoughts about so many things.. I can travel back, and build a snowman with my big sisters Elaine & Sandra without thinking about anything except whether the snow sticks together, and what we can possibly use for the snowman's mouth.......I want to go back to that simpler life..........I want to be six again.
Ruth Carter-Bourdon
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Childhood Fantasies
There are days when life gets tough,
And I would like to fly away.
To just go back to happier times,
When not a care came my way!
I would spend my time with fairies and sprites,
Oh, there would be elves and gremlins too!
What fun I would have when we played all day,
Just doing the fun things we would do!
They would take me back in time,
When things were much simpler then.
I would love each second of the day,
And each would become my special friend.
The fairies would make me laugh so much,
While making my dreams come true!
And sprites would scatter dandelion puffs,
That would sail toward skies of lovely blue.
Oh, to become a child again,
Living a life so sweet and carefree.
Enjoying smiles from dawn ¿til dusk,
Fairies, sprites, elves, gremlins and me!
A tiny elf would tell me tales
Of things only they could do.
And gremlins would play pranks on me
Just to give me a laugh or two!
So if you see my eyes glaze over,
And my thoughts begin to stray¿
Just know I'm living in memories,
Of one of my childhood's happier days.
They would always come to my rescue,
Whenever I was in need.
Giving me joy and laughter,
Making my life such fun indeed!
I think I¿ll close out all my worries,
Just get rid of my sad frown!
Then go to join my childhood friends,
And smile as we scamper around!
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