Carole Abrew:  

Another ??? years have passed since I last updated my profile. Less to report this time. First, I apologize for the weird eyes in the photo. Tried to fix but clearly was unsuccessful. I don't really look like that except when I'm REALLY angry (or in this case, really happy). This was Xmas, 2018 and the last picture anyone took of me, so the only one I could post that's even remotely recent. For the most part, things remain as they were...just some additional parts failing, drooping or not working properly. The good part? My mind still seems to be functioning relatively well...well enough...I think, but then, I'm the one doing the evaluation! What's new? For last five years I've been a facilitator for AgeSong Marin, a non-profit organization offering discussion groups for those of us over 65. My group of men and women has hung together for 4 years, adding and losing people along the way, with some long-timers too who have been with me from the start, bless them! I've just gotten a new co-facilitator--my previous partner decided that on her 90th birthday (October) she would become a group member again, rather than have the responsibilities of leading. We'll miss her. I provide the topics for discussion, based loosely on issues we face as we age, exploring our histories and/or our present circumstances. It seems our weekly conversation begins with the topic but ALWAYS wanders far afield from it at some point during the 90 minutes that follow! We laugh a lot, cry some too, as we share our stories. We neither judge, nor give advice (unless the latter is requested)... In the main, we find just being together (albeit now on Zoom) uplifting, comforting and supportive. It's strange, in a way, to meet folks you'd likely never encounter if not for AS, and know you're safe sharing the most intimate details of your life, yet that's what happens every week. Because isolation is an issue with so many of us as we age, AgeSong has been a blessing and so has Zoom! For example, I've never met my new co-facilitator in person--she's joining us from Bend, OR and we already know we're friends. As for members, we have one from the Central Valley but other groups have members in CN, VA, WA, Canada, and other places--folks who would never have had access to us or have formed new friendships if not for Zoom. My background in sociology helps a bit, but my co-facilitators (5 over the years) have all been therapists, so a nice mix since we are NOT group therapy and our director discovered early on, having a mix is wise lest we start down the therapy path! Still in my home, dealing with the problems that attend, and this year, staying in and "safe" since February when I had the virus. It lasted into mid-March. I could easily croaked but somehow didn't, despite severe shortness of breath, a body rash, killer headache, 24/7 cough, low oxygen saturation, etc., etc., etc. My docs wanted me tested--one at UCSF, the other in Novato--laughable, since I couldn't even make it to my kitchen! I'm still upright and above ground, and I guess that's the real bottom line. My hope for all of you and those you love is that not even one of you gets the virus. Another of the federal agents my husband and I worked with succumbed to it last week. So, be careful, and take it seriously. ANY fever should be investigated as well as a rash anywhere on your body that can't be explained. Get tested...please...so you're around for our next reunion! See you then...and Happy Holidays! c It's been almost a decade since I wrote my bio for this site...guess it's about time for an update, but it's surprising (and a bit disturbing) how little I have to add to what I wrote previously. I'm still editing, now exclusively for grad students. Shocking how poorly they write, but that's another story! I'm also working on a book about my years as a federal agent. It will never see publication. Somehow, getting things into a Word file can help expunge some of the evil I've faced. In a word (or three), writing is cathartic for me, and if it serves no other purpose, that's enough. I spent two years (through July 1, 2014) as a member of my county's Civil Grand Jury. The first year was wonderful--great people who will remain my friends for life. The second, not so much, although I made some friends that year who are very dear to me. Suffice it to say, poor leadership and personality ...Expand for more