Ernest Smiley:
CLASS OF 1975
Walt Whitman High SchoolClass of 1975
Bethesda, MD
Western Junior High SchoolClass of 1971
Bethesda, MD
Ernest's Story
About Me:
I am a extra ordinary dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees, I write award-winning operas, I manage time efficiently. Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row. I woo women with my sensuous and godlike trombone playing, I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook Thirty-Minute Brownies in twenty minutes. I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru. Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play bluegrass cello, I was scouted by the Washington Redskin's & New York Yankee's, please don't be enthralled. I am the subject of numerous documentaries. When I'm bored, I build large suspension bridges in my yard....Expand for more
On Wednesdays, I repair electrical appliances free of charge. I humbly yet most graciously declined an award from The Wall Street Journal for 'Gentleman w/the highest degree of integrity' with absolute traits of humility. I always' obey all laws at all times & never complain.It gives me much pleasure w/enthusiasm to pay the tax's at random of family's whom I'll never meet. I have the highest degree of ethic moral spiritual values which only found in 1 other. 'The Pope'. Scientist & nuclear physicists can only attribute this super gene to my hereditary bloodline of superiority while maintaining complete control of self at all times. Most importantly, while my seed is in the greatest demand for reproduction & even if you beg like a severely scorned caged animal, I will never show you my wwan lined with pearls. This I attribute to my Father's gene pool & am disciplined w/fortified obedience for I only answer to the utmost Highest authority of all--God Almighty Himself*.
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