Keith Flournoy:  

K- The Ultimate Rocker's Blurbs About me: Ok, I was born in the swamps of Louisiana back in Nineteen Hundred and sixty-Four. At the age of two, I crawled out of my bedroom window and hitch-hiked to Alabama. One day, I was at a convience store, and while grabbing for a Heinekin in the beer cooler, the door shut and i was trapped. I remained there until someone came in and saw all the empty Heinekin bottles and my head just above the pile. That person, became my dad. After peeing for 32 min." I was told I consumed 22 Heinekins" he took me home to Auburn Alabama. I quickly learned the battle cry of War Damn Eagle! I then learned of my older brother, which I would refer to as Oxie boy. If you ever see him, you will know why. A couple of years later, while picking cabbage for our corn bread,milk and Cabbage dinner, I found my sister Tracey. And believe it or not, 6 years later, I was out one morning , picking cabbage, and low and behold, I found another one, my sister Becky. Oh, I do have a mom, but she was the one cooking Corn bread and cabbage. By the time I was 13, I was a child prodigy. I went from 8th grade straight to M.I.T. I graduated top of my class at the age of 15. Dont believe me, google it. When I entered the "work force" I decided to "buck" the system, and became a Gigolo. My story was later made into a movie starring Richard Gere. I later made a woman very happy when I took pity and became her husband. That lasted for a bit, then, I decided to follow my lifelong dream and became a radio DJ. Within 3 weeks of being on the air, I was syndicated by over 500 radio stations worldwide. I am still big in Japan. There is a movie in the works called K- The Ultimate Rocker. When you become a superstar such as I, a lot of endorsements come your way. I have a deal with Nike. My own shoe! The K-Rocker. There were a limited number of 5,000 made and it was the fastest selling shoe in Nike history. Mtv actually had a contest called " I wanna wear the shoes that K-Rocker wears". Over 3.5 billion people entered. NASA actually invited me to be on the 1st space Shuttle launch. I had to decline. From radio, I was approached to do a tour. A music tour at that. I had no formal training or musical lessons. That didn't seem to matter. As soon as the public learned that their "hero" was gonna tour, Every show sold out in 6 min. A feat which the likes of Zeppelin, Clapton, Kiss or anyone has come close to obtaining. The marketing and merchandise was crazy. They rung the sweat from my towels and sold 1 oz. bottles for $300.00. My guitar picks sold on ebay for record amounts. My 1st cd called, I can't play or sing, but people worship me", sold 500 million copies worldwide in 3 weeks. Dont believe me? It's in the guiness book of records. I have been invited to the White House 38 times over the years. All the super models want to date me. I just dont have time. So, the story will continue. Oh, if you were one of the lucky ones to get one of the 1 oz bottles of K-Rocker sweat, they are now selling for over $2,000. Till next time..... Part 2: As they say, all good things must come to an end, or do they? R...Expand for more