Mark Hoerr:  

CLASS OF 1972
Mark Hoerr's Classmates® Profile Photo
Friends SchoolClass of 1972
Cleveland, OH
Hawken SchoolClass of 2002
Gates mills, OH
Seattle, WA
Oberlin CollegeClass of 1978
Oberlin, OH
Hampshire CollegeClass of 1976
Amherst, MA

Mark's Story

Life This is difficult because these bios tend to be a platform for displaying your achievements. What I have to display is not very shiny. Before I went to Oberlin, I worked at the Cleveland Free Clinic as Clinic Coordinator and Janitor. The Clinic was a converted Frat House. It was a "shifted 60's" experience which. in part directied me to go to medical school at CWRU after a year as a lab tech in a medical research lab. The other part was that my dad was the chief of surgery and chairman of the board of directors at the Cleveland Clinic and, being the youngest, I was the last chance to continue the family "medical tradition." I thought that becoming a psychiatrist would be a compromise between the pressure to become a doctor and my interest in mystical religions and that I would complete medical school feeling competent and enlightened. That was wrong. I've been a commuinity psychiatrist for the last 18 years. My patients are indigent, with a high percentage of concurrent personality disorders and substance abuse. I see outpatients and involuntarily committed inpatients. Over the years, I have had to work longer hours, do more paperwork, deal with an unexpected number of psychiatrist bosses who are sociaopaths. My work hours have consistently gone up and my standard of living has gone down. I like the work for the most part but I'm too tired and have too many problems of my own to have much of a social life. One of my first patients was a high school classmate from Cleveland who somehow managed to get admitted to me as a resident. Im my first goup session, he said he had the delusion that his doctor was a highschool classmate. I apologized to him that I hadn't been able to talk to him before, but he wasn't delusional. Later, on rounds with my supervisor, we entered his room. My supervisor intimidated even the residents. He stared at my classmate who looked very anxious, turned to me and said, "whatever he's on, he needs more of it." After...Expand for more
the supervisore left, my classmate said he wanted to leave. I said I didn't blame him and discharged him. Unlocked the door and let him out. I lost respect for my future professsion and gained respect for the people we treat. I still haven't framed any of my diplomas and have never felt comfortalbe with being labeled a doctor. I have lost my belief that psychotherapy is all that usefull in making longterm change in dysfunctional personality structures. In a way this is good because ps;ychiatrists are not hired in the communit;;y health system to do therapy, even though a large part of my residency involved learning to be a psychotherapist. Mental health centers con only afford psychiatrists to prescribe medications and hire people with much less training to provide psychotherapy. I got married while in residency to a woamn who was a year behind me in medical school and who became a psychiatrist too. We had 2 children who are now 18 (Michael) and 15 (Hannah). My wife divorced me when Hannah was 2. Despite my psychiatric training, I'm still not real sure why. I remarried a mental health specialist. She had 2 daughters who lived with us for 5 years. In 2000, her eldest daughter was the only fatality in a car crash in which she was driving intoxicated and broadsided a telephone pole. She was in the ICU for a week and was expected to survive when her intracranial pressure blew through the roof and she was declared brain dead. Over the next 3 years, predictably enough, my relationship with my wife deteriorated. From my perspective, she displaced her anger and loss of control onto me. She left me 3 years ago. It wiped me out emotionally and financially. I feel uncomfortale around people and don't really enjoy being alone. I don't really have any friends any more and I would feel uncomfortable inflicting myself on people because of the emotional consequences of too many rejections even though intellectually I Think I'm okay. Psychotherapy doesn't help.
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