Patrick Griffin:
CLASS OF 1969
Pontiac Northern High SchoolClass of 1969
Pontiac, MI
Patrick's Story
Who am I really? Well, the truth can finally be told. I'm the love child of Robert Kennedy and Marilyn Monroe. At least, I think that it was Bobby. It might have been Jack. Or the Seventh Fleet. At any rate, after a brief stint of being raised by wolves, I was adopted by my putative parents, Len and Betty Jean. Len died 20 years ago. He was 70, and his liver was 110. My mother is still ostensibly alive, although her senility has worsened to the point that she now thinks that it is 1920, and that I am F. Scott Fitzgerald. To be fair, my writing ability and penchant for cellulloid collars my contribute to that confusion. After high school, I joined the Pink Berets, a super secret and extremely feared commando group who redecorated the temple at Angor Watt in Art Deco. After the military, I returned to Michigan and attended Engineering Schoo...Expand for more
l at Oakland University, where I majored in Advanced Celibacy and Slide Rule. I also picked up a psychology major. And married her. And divorced her. After Oakland, I went to U of M Law School, where I took an advanced degree in Celibacy, or, as I called it, Paper Chaste. I then became a corporate patent attorney, after a series of only partially successful organ reduction surgeries. About 17 dog years ago, I married a little blonde with the body of Claudia Schiffer and the personality of The Alien. The tattoo, "If you can read this, you must be rich" should have been a tip off. Since my recent divorce, I have been exploring the possibilities for love on Craig's List. To my horror, it proved to be Larry Craig's List. Who knew? I did get two lovely teens out of the deal, one of each, and when they aren't breaking my heart, they are filling it.
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