Robin Anne Palmer:
CLASS OF 1973
Del Rio High SchoolClass of 1973
Del rio, TX
Del Rio School of Vocational NursingClass of 1982
Del rio, TX
East Side Elementary SchoolClass of 1966
Del rio, TX
Robin Anne's Story
To my fellow classmates.
I hope all of you are in great health.
I have debated about writing and sharing this for such a long time.I have had mixed feelings and I really did not want to open the closet & let the skeletons out so to speak in my personal, as well as my school life. As you can see from the above "now & then" pictures, I have changed just a bit. No, I am not trying to get the "Most Changed" honor either. I'm still the same person I always was... I just look better. More on that later. To use that old phrase... there has been a whole lot of water flow under the bridge in 50+ years time. I finally said to myself that if I said everything was great in HS, I would be lying to you & myself. Although this is quite lengthy, (Sorry, but hey, this is my story-also be sure to read the timelines and picture captions for more info too) if you read everything here, I promise you that you will then gain a greater understanding of how one person coped through a most difficult time in her life, & perhaps find out what kind a person she turned out to be. No telling how many times these same kind of situations have happened in peoples lives, & how they were resolved.
The Beginnings
I will tell you that I hated school due to those arrogant, self-centered individuals. I often wondered why I was targeted. I guess they "picked" on me because I was big, overweight & slow. I guess as in nature it was a kind of a teenager pecking order. At first it was the name calling of “Baby Huey” later it became physical with hitting and kicking. Like in a mob, their actions spread to others, & soon I felt shunned by more than just that handful of bullies. It started in Jr High on N. Main Street in 7th grade and lasted through the 12th grade. Yes, even as a senior in high school, I would get pushed,kicked and spat upon. Everyday it happened, nearly all day long, even on the weekends as I would run into some of the bullies around town and even at church. I quit going to Sunday School in High School because I would have at least one day free from that crap. What does the Lord's Prayer say.... Forgive us our trespasses,as we forgive those who trespass against us...And what does it say in the Bible about turning the other cheek? It gets old after a while and hurt turns into hate and after a time that hate causes one to become indifferent. I dreaded getting up in the morning, for I knew what was going to happen to me that day anyway. I hardly did my homework as I said, What's the use... I never went to a dance, or the proms, never got to work on the bonfire....I never went to Mexico, or any of the hang-outs, again I said to myself, Why should I get more humiliated. Tell me, who would want to run around with a a fat, ugly duckling named Baby Huey?
I had lost any self confidence that I ever had. You would think that they would grow up.... You would also think that their parents had taught them differently... I must say that my own family was loving & we did things together. We may not have had the money to join the country club,or live in a fancy house in Buena Vista, but we learned to be of service to others in our community,church & the schools. You see, money isn't everything in this life. All you can take with you is that which you've given away.
If it weren't for being in the band & drama, I probably would have dropped out of school,or worse, committed suicide. Those subjects were my only escape outlets. I tried to look the other way & turn my cheek,hold my own & fight my own battles throughout all of this. I tried being nice to them... That was a Big Mistake! The few times I struck out physically & retaliated against them, I got paid back ten fold with more bruises and attacks. I never really said anything to my parents at the time. When I did come home with noticeable bruises & red marks. I blamed it on falling, or that I had run into something. The pain & hurt that was on the inside is something I tried never show. I never wanted to be a cry baby. Even though most of you called me “Baby Huey” you don’t know how much I hated that. You really don’t know…Ethan,John,Ricky, Antonio, Louis,et al, What happened in Uvalde could’ve happened here ….
I saw how the school principals handled situations like this & I saw that it was futile & there was no use in trying to fight the "good ole boy system". I could either duke it out after school and settle it "man to man"or transfer to Comstock, or Brackettville like some of our classmates had done. (I remember Gary VanLandingham fought it out in a " legally" sanctioned fight with Coach Jimmy Bradley right there in the middle of things watching it all.)
Back then, the privileged bullies in our public schools knew that they could get away with the physical assaults that they inflicted upon me over the years. Many times I came home with bruises on my body, my chest, arms, legs, or back from the beatings that I received on the school grounds or in the hallways in the cafeteria, or restrooms and classrooms. Had I involved my parents on this it would’ve made matters so much worse. I learned to just shut my mouth and take the beatings.
I even recall the son of one my mothers best friends when she was growing up was one of those bullies.
There were so many times that I had wished that I had never been born.... Now days there are laws, and lawsuits do happen more & more to protect people from that type of harassment. But has it really changed in 40+ years?
I was talking with one of my girlfriends the other day and she was telling me about her problems with her child's principal telling her that her child was fat, & that was why he was getting called names, & getting pushed around at school. He offered no help & told her that her child should get on a diet & lose his fat! When will we as a society grow up & accept people no matter what they look like on the outside and accept each other for who we are on the inside?.... Too simple of a concept to actual work don't you think?.... World Peace?.... It begins at home...
Avoiding Conflicts and regrets
I know I lost out from having life long friends like a lot of my fellow classmates have today. I missed out on a lot of experiences because of being harassed. Not to mention being robbed of an EDUCATION.I was always on edge. If that wasn't bad enough, the few friends that I thought I had, succumbed under peer pressure into doing some of the same kind of antics. In HS I soon learned that I could avoid some problems if I ate alone or sat way away from everyone and ate at an empty table, or at times I would not eat at all. I never hung around the mall area or went outside, but hid out in the library a lot.I went out the band hall entrance as well as in it. I never drove my 1st car a 1966 VW (which I rebuilt & have today) except for that last week of school for the fear of someone putting sugar in the gas tank, as had happened to others.
During the assemblies, I sat on the ends of the bleachers so no one would see me. I became a loner not that I wanted to, but in order to survive.But my fellow classmates are the ones responsible for not allowing me into their lives as a friend. How does that saying go, Out of sight, out of mind....The downside was I cheated myself as most of you really never knew me and visa versa. It's not that I didn't try at the time to be different... But every time I tried, I soon got shot down. You all considered me to be the biggest joke to walk the hallways.
The one instance I can ever remember being needed and cheered by my fellow classmates was during the 'class competitions' during the last month of our senior year-during the tug of war contest. I guess it was only out of downright necessity because I was big & weighed nearly 310 pounds. Come to think about it, I remember Coach Fest pulling me out of my English class in the 9th grade and talking to me outside the room. He was wanting me to be on the varsity football team. We had a losing season so he was at his wits end and was trying desperately to have a winning team… of course, I refused to help him, and for that, he said, only sissies were in the band.
By the way, for those who didn't know, I was on the varsity track & field team when I was a senior. I did shot put & discus. I never could throw as well as Tom Caldwell however, But I gave it my all. I never did get a letter for it..
I wish in one sense that I could turn back the clock and start all over again...
I know that is an impossibility and a hundred years from now... who's going to know or care anyway..... Life is too short.
After HS, Thank God!
I wanted so badly to go to UT Austin & be in the Longhorn Band like my brother had done, but I never could get a high enough SAT score. I wonder why....?
I went to Angelo State University after DRHS & graduated with a BA in Secondary Education with teaching fields in Speech, Psychology, History & Health Education. I was in the band, & choir and had a partial scholarship all 4 years & was on the Deans List. It wasn't that easy as I had to learn the basic things that...Expand for more
I should have learned in High School & I worked part time to pay my way since they were partial scholarships & did not pay for everything.
I did pretty good considering when I was in High School I was told by either Mr. Benson or Mr. Zuniga that I would have 4 chances out of 10, if that, to make a C in college.
I traveled to Europe and sang in several cathedrals my senior year as part of a 150 person choir chosen from all over the USA through my church. (I was one of 5 from Texas.) I had to memorize 30 or so anthems including some in German & Latin and each country's National anthem. ( I was used to memorizing music as all the halftime performances in HS & College required one to do that.) I also tried out for a solo part to The Battle Hymn of the Republic & got it. I will never forget singing in Notre-Dame in Paris, or at Dachau,Germany, the site of the very 1st Nazi Concentration Camp near Munich. I think it was 7 different countries that we toured and I almost got to see an 8th, as the flight that I missed to return from Washington DC back to Texas via Atlanta got hijacked to Cuba. I was enjoying seeing everything I could in our nations capital & forgot what day I was to return to Texas.(Things happen for reasons...& I don't think it was because I didn't know the Cuban National anthem)
I was also the Circulation Manager for the college newspaper, "The Ram Page" for 2 years & was on the yearbook staff. I learned TV production at the local television station in San Angelo. I also made radio sales commercials. In college, I became a Red Cross WSI & went to the National Camping School of the Boy Scouts of America earning my Aquatics Certification in order to teach rowing, canoeing, swimming & lifesaving courses, & became a CPR instructor. I was the Aquatic Director & taught & supervised my staff at Camp Sol Mayer & Camp Fawcett for 5 weeks that summer. During my years at ASU, I tried out for Man from La Mancha and garnered the role of The Captain of the Inquisition. The next year I composed & performed the music for one of the plays that the Drama Dept. took that production to national competition.
Like I said, I was in the band and traveled all around Texas/Mexico playing for football/basketball games & recruitment tours. I also met several Country & Western Music singers while I was in the Rodeo Band at ASU. I remember Bill Anderson, Jeannie C. Riley to name a few. I was fortunate to have met several Hollywood personalities when they came on campus including Vincent Price & Star Trek's creator Gene Roddenberry & others. Which reminds me.... In 1995 I was a movie extra in Tommy Lee Jones "The Good Old Boys". Ironically, I portrayed the tuba player in the San Angelo Rodeo band. (Tommy is a very personable & a really nice fellow by the way, ) And yes, I still play the bass (Tuba) even today. How many of my fellow classmates that were on the “football team” can still run with the football?
After College
After 5 years ( I lost a half a year after losing my spleen in a motorcycle accident, which I did not learn my lesson as I still ride my Honda ACE 1100 today) I came back to Del Rio after graduating mid term & was going to take a teaching position in Spur, Texas when my Father passed on. I decided to stick around & help my mother out with things. After trying to get hired at several school districts locally, I soon observed that most of the human resource directors preferred & wanted someone in a short skirt. (If they could only see me now!!) I had to get employed somewhere & help put beans on the table. I went back to school & became a nurse & worked for the next 42 years I retired the next year and then I ran neglected position on the Hospital board . I am currently serving my second year as being the board vice president..
The Real Me
I realize that what I am about to express may just turn some of you off, & you just might write me off as a person. Needless to say, if that's the case & your prerogative, that's unfortunate & it will be your loss.
If you have read this far, you will get that all important question answered soon as to why the "change". I will say again since. Life is so short one must be happy with the choices they make. Always be true to yourself. I am open, I don't try to hide & I do hold my head up high. To the ignorant ones that only think people like us are like what they saw on Jerry Springer or Oprah Winfrey, I will say consider the source. I guess there will always be that element of education as for an example, there are still those today that think by eating too much sugar that you will get Diabetes....
I have been accepted for what's on the inside, not what's on the outside. In other words, don't judge a book by it's cover.
Ok, with that being said....
I always knew from an early age that I was not who most of you thought I was. There again, perhaps that's why I was verbally and later physically abused for so many years in school. I never really fit in & I knew it, but I had to remain silent & put on a front in order to survive in Del Rio. Times have changed a little and for the most part people are more accepting or perhaps they are more tolerant of those who don't fit into what is society's so called mold of A and B..or M or F.
People have told me that it takes balls to do what I have done. I think it took more balls to get up every morning and go to school just to get made fun of by others.......
Because of my actions,some of my relationships with others have changed somewhat. I have been accepted by those close to me including my family, patients & church.
Oh, just to let you know... I am NOT a sexual pervert, child molester or any other offender.
On September 25,2018 I finally had the surgery that made me whole as a woman . I traveled to San Francisco to see Dr. Marci Bowers.
I came back as a California girl!
On November 4, 2020 I was elected by a large margin to an at-large position at Val Verde Regional Medical Center Hospital Board of Directors.
I am also the trustees chair at my church as well as the historian.
Class reunions
At our very first class reunion at 10 years I could care less about going and even helping put it together as some of the organizers were some of the same bullies in high school. I stayed by myself for the most part. I thought things would change when the 20th class reunion rolled around but it was the same. 9 years later when someone asked me are we going to have something for the 30th, I remarked that why don’t you put it together as I could care less.
Another nine years later, I had gained so much courage to come out and when people asked what about our 40th class reunion we need to have one I said OK I’ll help organize it. It was a smashing success from all accounts that I have been told.. five years later people were asking for another reunion. So I did the same thing for the 45th class reunion. In fact I did two of them,one before I went to California and one after. The reason being is that several in the organizing group only wanted to have the reunion at a certain time which many other classmates could not make it because of other commitments. So I had 2 reunions. I was blamed by some of the out of town participants that I was dividing the class. No matter what I said they kept saying that by having 2 gatherings I was dividing the class. Anyhow I was thanked by so many people for having the two different gatherings and to those that were the naysayers, they were upset that it was a success. So I say to them, you all organize the next reunion..
I don’t need the drama.. but stupid me. I did the 50th reunion as well with some help and then I still get chewed out by some of the out-of-town people..
Life Now
I have learned to forgive and move on and become a better person because of those that gave so much grief . My hope & prayer for all of you who have children, grandchildren, nieces or nephews,is that you have taught them to respect others, Live by the Golden Rule & finally, I hope & pray that no one ever has to go through what had happened to me. As I have been told by one of my friends I was never that ugly duckling that I was made out to be.
In closing I leave you all with the following words of wisdom....
Your life is yours, you own it, and what you make of it is purely up to you. Others may support you in your aspirations, but, in the end it's your creation. You have the responsibility to live an authentic life, so you must free yourself from the superficial values that are in the way. You must think for yourself,decide what is right for you and get in touch with your own thoughts, needs and desires. Lastly, you must embrace your own values and live what you believe to be true. Then,& only then,are you authentic. Then,and only then, can you live up to your true potential.
Lastly,I have so many friends now, (BTW, there's always room for more) to quote Jimmy Stewart from one of my all time favorite classic movies, "It's a Wonderful Life" ... No person is a failure who has friends.
Peace, Love & Happiness
Robin Anne
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