Heather McGregor:  

mby has a better body than you. Boom, roasted. Dwight, you’re a kiss-ass. Boom, roasted. Pam, you failed art school. Boom, roasted. Meredith, you’ve slept with so many guys you’re starting to look like... one. Boom, roasted. Kevin, I can’t decide between a fat joke or a dumb joke. Boom,roasted. Creed, your teeth called, your breath stinks. Boom, roasted. Angela, where’s Angela? Whoa, there you are. I didn’t see you there behind that grain of rice. Boom, roasted. Stanley, you crush your wife during sex and your heart sucks. Boom, roasted. Oscar, you’re gay. Boom, roasted. Andy, Cornell called, they think you suck. And you’re gayer than Oscar. Boom, roasted. -Michael Scott "I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run if you will, so I'm afraid I have something of a mess on my hands." - Dr. Tobias Funke, Analrapist "it's hard to stay mad, when there's so much beauty in the world. Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much, my heart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst... And then I remember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it, and then it flows through me like rain and I can't feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life..." -Lester Burnham, American Beauty".