Jeff Trauth:
CLASS OF 1979
Saint Mary SchoolClass of 1979
Alexandria, KY
Bishop Brossart High SchoolClass of 1984
Alexandria, KY
Jeff's Story
MY STORY
A lot has happened to me since graduating from the hallowed halls of Bishop Brossart High School. Unfortunately due to a injury sustained on the face of the Matterhorn in 1992 I can only recall a fleeting few memories. One such is this....
It was a dark and dreary night. But alas I woke up and found myself knee deep in quicksand. Yes, I had drifted further south in the Great Sahara than even I had imagined. The hot dry sand pulled me down like so many African Parrots yet the thought of Allysia carried me through. Sweet Allsiya, the Egyptian bronze goddess I had met just three nights before in a crowded bazaar in Alexandria. (Alexandria, Egypt. Ironic, huh).
Nonetheless I gathered the strength of many men and pulled myself to safety, the though of a reunion with my Egyptian maid pulsing through my mind like so many things that would pulse through a mind such as my own.
My Bedoiun guides were not far away so we continued our quest to find the last remains of Irwin Rommel's eye thingy. (You know those glasses with only one eye piece, like Colonel Klink had I think). Anyways, we mounted our horses at dawn that afternoon and set off into the setting Sahar...Expand for more
a sun, thoughts of those eye thingys pulsing through my brain.
A grand reward awaited the one who unearthed the eyepiece thingy. Dan Smith, curator at the Egyptian Center for Really Cool Egytian Things and Insurance had promised me Untold Riches if only I produced the artifact. A fitting reward for a man as valiant and spectacular I as. So I said "Sure, Dan. Lets Do the Thing". And so after hiring 100 Bedouin guides and that one guy from the second Mummy movie we were off!
Later that day we did find Rommel's Eyepiece. Strangely it was kept by a man named Habib. Habib was 20th generation Egyptian yet spoke in a Brooklyn accent he said he had developed to foil all those who had come before in search of the Forbidden Monocle of Rommel. (At least thats what he called it). Oddly, Habib found it on the backroom of his gas station (again a front to spoil would be adventure seekers).
After paying a small tribute ($68,000 US dollars) the Monocle was MINE!!
The rest of the tale remains only a vague recollection suffice it to say that my trip back to Britain was a long and treacherous ship's travail with much warm beer and naseous crew members.
Then we went for nachoes.
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