Michael Modes:  

Life I was born in the wagon of a traveling show mama used to dance for the money they'd throw. School I vaguely remember school--red building, right? I always wanted to be a grown up when I grew up. My family and friends thought that was a good idea. As it turns out, they were deluded. I spent a number of years believing I was King Tut after being hit on the head with a brick at a love in. If I'm going to work somewhere, I need to have guns, drugs, and a deep belief in string theory to be able to deal with the day-to-day. My only hero is Bryantman, the hero of home heating and cooling. You can hear his exploits in radio ads nationwide. I didn't create him. I just put words in his mouth. He likes nachos, but is confused by quiche. I've lived in Portland, Winthrop, Augusta, Portland, Los Angeles, Fountain Valley, Westminster, Los Angeles, Coalinga, Los Angeles, San Diego, Winnetka, Woodland Hills, Los Angeles, Jacksonville, Seattle, San Francisco and Pittsburgh. The one person from my past who I'd most like to see again is Fred Farkas, because he owes me $6.00. Fantasy baseball. Old Time Radio. Travel. Singing badly. Swimming. Walking. Animals. Bodysurfing. My biggest surprise is ambitiousness, but it's more around proving it to myself than anything else. What teacher would I love to see again? Mrs. Glen, my sixth grade art teacher. To tell her to stay away from children and make sure she wasn't able to torture small animals or pull the wings off butterflies, either. If I won $100 million, I'd give a lot of it to abused kids, then spend the rest on a minor league, baseball team and a small zoo without going all Jacko. Was rushed by a frat, but said no when they started making fun of punk rock. Shoulda stayed for the chicks. My current age is 48. When I was 12, I ...Expand for more