William Fellows:
CLASS OF 1993
St. Mary's High SchoolClass of 1993
Independence, MO
University of MissouriClass of 1998
Rolla, MO
Nativity SchoolClass of 1989
Independence, MO
William's Story
Life
Wow, so much has changed since graduation in my life. Where to begin? I've had a sex change operation. Twice actually. It's a good thing I decided to have them save my bits and pieces, eh? I've eaten supper, quite a few times. I bet I've eaten supper at least once a week since graduation, maybe more. My professional life has been rather uneventful. After breaking my leg trying to imitate the guy who caught the extra point at the NFL game by leaping from the stands, I had to give up my dreams of being a Rockette and went back to gutting fish. It's rather rewarding to know that after a hard day's work, a family can sit down and eat the fruits of my labor. I don't know though, with it warming up back in the Midwest, I may return and be a hotdog vendor at the K. Then I could see the faces of the people I serve. I had also thought about running for Congress or becoming a butterfly. Time can only tell what I'll do.
Since I wrote that, I ate supper l...Expand for more
ast night. It was a yummy sammich but not the "Hook 'em up sammich" as advertised on the corner of 31st and 71 Highway. I also had a MoonPie with my supper. Now that was truly delicous!
What else could you possibly care about. I started my own religion - I thought I was worth it. It focuses very heavily on controlled substances, repetitive music, beatings and croquet.
My love life has certainly improved since I started this religion. I've been married 14 times and divorced only once. And, if any of my agents, errrr followers can find her, I'm sure she will see the folly in her ways. I have also been blessed with an abundance of children -- 37 at last count. Truly I am deserving.
Currently, I'm blind. I was sucking a giant Pixie Stick and nothing was coming out. I held it up to see if there was any Pixie Stick left and it all came tumbling down into my eye balls. I also have watermellons stuck to my feet.
Finally, who the hell is Lane Loves?
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